God:   Write!

Me:     About what?

God:   Me…

Me:     What shall I write about You?

God:   Everything you know about Me….

And that’s how it started…….

You know it’s amazing what you can write about God & the many facets and levels that exist, unknowingly to many.  Yet when asked to write, I know God exists.  I believe that Jesus Christ is the son of God who died for us at the cross.  However, what shall I write about you, without over spilling into my own experiences and testimony (it seems funny to write that word).  So…. let me give an account from what I know to be true for me.

I know that He has opened spiritual eyes for me to see past the reality of this world, while I refuse to limit God with what He can do about any situation, at whatever stage you are on your path.  Even to think you are straying, God can and will remind you of just whose you are, through dreams, people, or any sort of media.  Confirmed time and time again, just in case you missed it the first time, or the tenth time, or a hundredth time (I think the point has been made Junie)

I cry in God’s presence……I defy anyone who wouldn’t, when he sends wave after wave of His love.  You can feel it coursing through and hitting your body.  I know God is real, simply for this reason!

‘I HAVE NEVER KNOWN LOVE LIKE HIS’.

Have you ever wondered why you left eternity to be here on earth?  God sent me a dream when I was about 10/11 years old, (I knew almost 15 years later that it was from God but I did not realise that then), which lasted all but 5 seconds.

In the dream, I was standing before God, all dressed in white and He was sitting on His throne, with one hand gently stroking His chin in contemplation as He listened attentively to what I was saying.  ‘Please let me go’, ‘Please let me go’, I pleaded.  When I woke up, I really thought, what a strange dream, which some 24 years later, was so vivid that I was able to recall it as if it was yesterday.  It was some 18 years later after a 1-to-1 in prayer with God, that I felt the urge to switch on the television.  As soon as I had switched on the T.V., I heard a woman say, ‘I woke up this morning, opened the curtains and I thought I had woken up in Hell’.  No picture had appeared on the television yet, but those words sent a shiver through me.  I was riveted to the spot, waiting for the image to become visible.  As the images came up – it was a news report on the fires that were blazing through Beverly Hills, Hollywood (me thinks).  Houses and lives were being lost in fire.  Those words, ‘I thought that I had woken up in Hell’, still rang through me.  I fell to my knees and cried for the stark reality of those words for many.  Then God reminded me of my dream, many years ago.  It dawned on me that I had asked, no begged God to let me come to earth.  This new-found revelation blew me away and I cried even more bitterly.  I asked God why did I wish to come here, with all this suffering and the many tests and trials that we endure.  To my amazement, God allowed me to recall more of my dream…. ‘Don’t you remember’, He said…’YOU PROMISED YOU WOULD BRING LOADS MORE BACK!’  He was talking to me even when I did not know.

I feel as if I have committed more sin as a Christian than I ever did before being ‘saved’.  I have found intimacy with God and also loneliness when I took a step back from my path when I would not pray.  God still made a way to show me a sight that He was right by my side and a very present help.

It is a sad fact that I came to God one evening after a bad day at work.  I walking into my house and through to the living room, without switching on the lights.  I just slumped down onto the settee and questioned life itself, as the moonlight danced around the familiar furniture in the room.  I spoke as if someone was with me, ‘You get up, go to work, come home, eat your dinner and go to bed’.  I repeated, ‘You get up, go to work, come home, eat your dinner and go to bed’.  I echoed my reality a final time, ‘You get up, go to work, come home, eat your dinner and go to bed’….’God!  There must be more to life than this?’  I believed in the sanctity of those words and spoke them aloud.  I refused to believe that this was all that my life had to offer and the mundane routine of life itself.  I let go of the thought and retired early to bed.  Little did I know that my question had been heard by God and He was getting me ready to meet Him.

One week later, my nephew invited me to church.  It’s funny but all I could think about was the question that I asked one week ago and deep down, I knew God had brought this invitation to me to learn more about my existence and true purpose in life.  So, I asked out loud again, ‘if you will me there then confirm it and impress it on my heart to obey.  Sunday came and I went to church – it was called the ‘New Life’ Centre, and God greeted me at the door and led me in (when God greets you, you know about it and you sense Him with every fiber of your being).  The Pastor of the church came up to me, and introduced himself to me.  I told him who I was and how I came to be invited.  The next words that he spoke was this, ‘June!  This is YOUR church’.  I smiled, then said, ‘I know’, as this was the confirmation I asked for.

You see…about 3-4 months prior to this event, I was baptized.  For all the scriptures I had read, I could only remember one and that was you had to be baptized to enter the kingdom of Heaven.  I was baptized at the age of 28 years old, in Northampton by the Jesus Army (along with two other friends, but that’s another story).  I, however, was not committed to selling all and joining the communion or even travelling there every Sunday from Wolverhampton, so I stopped going altogether for a few months.   God then sent me an awful dream of being kicked out of Heaven and I awoke panting for breath and clutching my chest.  I knew what the dream meant, so I said out loud, ‘If you want me to go to Church, then send me to the one I will like’….hence, the New Life Centre and the story continues from there……